you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
