And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
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with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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