I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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