Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
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