just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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