I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
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