Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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