My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
