marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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