she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
