that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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