you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
