this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
