It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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