Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Are my feet made of real feet?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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