That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
