Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
