So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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