When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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