At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
