i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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