ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
