party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
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is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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