I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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