Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
