I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize