I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
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Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
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You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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