I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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