...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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