I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
