I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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