he shaved USA in his pubs
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize