i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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