Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
