You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
