Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
