I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
