A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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