I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize