i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
