I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize