people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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