apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
