can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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