Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Randomize
