Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Randomize