I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
