so that wasnt chicken after all
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
