have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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