He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
