We're like a lot better than the average bears
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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