margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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